we joke about procrastination but nothing is worse than the nauseating feeling of having every intention of doing something but physically not being capable of doing it and then feeling like you want to throw up because the deadline is just getting closer and closer.
I hope you fall in love with a man with good music taste and a jawline stronger than your wifi connection
Nothing makes you look more suspicious than randomly laughing while doing science, because you know who else randomly laughs while doing science? Supervillians.
So I was out with a friend of mine today. We were in line at a restaurant, and these two girls come up behind us, and they both have Dumdum lollipops. Well, one of them was being quite noisy, so I lean over to my friend and say, “If she doesn’t stop giving that Dumdum a blowjob, I’m going to take it and shove it up her nose.” The girl stopped after that.
translation: “talk to me, Swan, or I literally might die”
guys please, I cannot answer all 0 messages